Beating the Odds...

I grew up with two best friends. A few weeks ago one of those friends got married to his girlfriend of a little over a year. In June, the other is getting married to her boyfriend of almost four years. Four people, at or under the age of twenty with no college degree and without a steady, well paying job, married and off to start their lives as “responsible adults” in society.  The best day of their lives and all I could think about was statistics in this situation. “60 percent of marriages for couples between the ages of 20 and 25 end in divorce” (National Center for Health Statistics), that’s an unsettling thought. To think that my two friends, happy in the here and now, have a 40 percent chance of being “together forever.” In a few years they may or may not have children, but will these kids be the saving factors in their marriage or will they become a statistic also? Will they be able to advance in life without the degrees the business world tells us we must have to get a decent job and not slip below the standard? Would they really have a better chance if they had waited?

All of these statistics and weddings only got me deeper into reflection- what about my life, relationship, education, future? Do I want to be another number, or do I want to continue on with my education and basically “marry my degree?” Studies show that women who marry older and are more career focused are less likely to be happily married, are more likely to cheat on their husbands, and also less likely to have children or be happy with having children. I don’t want my future to be sad and alone- I want a family eventually- but I also want to be successful with a doctorate in one hand and my own practice in the other.

So many thoughts swimming in my head. I know I can’t control others and I can’t control statistics, but I can control myself. I know what I want and how to execute it, all I can do is live, wait and see, and hope I’m not another number.